Nightly Gathering

Open Thread Post 144 - Lack of Motivation

These past couple of weeks I have been in a funk of sorts, and although it must be related to the death of Morgan, I cannot be sure of it. My work feels more like a chore instead of a job I enjoy, or something busy enough that keeps sad thoughts at bay. I haven’t cooked anything with a recipe in ages. I have ideas for my yard and house, but I don’t seem to be able to rally up the motivation to even look for what I want online, let alone go somewhere and look at things. I feel like I’m mostly going through the motions in most other parts of my life as well.

It sounds like depression is setting in perhaps, but if it is, I don’t think it’s entirely related to the death of Morgan. I’ve felt unmotivated at times in years past as well. I will get through it.

I have a lot of Morgan’s stuff to go through sometime. I have to take the rest of her clothes to a thrift store. I have to sort out and sell some stuff on Facebook Marketplace (as her, ugh!) and then donate what I didn’t sell. These are things like used and unused medical scrubs, an unopened artificial ficus tree she had ordered and had not even unboxed, decorative pillows, an afghan, knick knacks, some wall art. There is an apple watch but I can’t find the charger. So sell it without? Go buy a charger for it first? These are things I don’t have it in me to figure out right now. I’ve already told you her car needs to be sold, but that means it has to be cleaned out first. There is so much of her still in there. It makes me tear up thinking about that.

Related to my Music Musings post the other day, a friend sent me two songs that evoke that spiritual sense/God feeling (Christian song without being Christian) in her, and I agree.

Lyrics

"Love Is The Answer"

Name your price
A ticket to paradise
I can't stay here anymore

And I've looked high and low
I've been from shore
To shore to shore

If there's a shortcut
I'd have found it
But there is no
Easy way around it

Light of the world, shine on me
Love is the answer
Shine on us all, set us free
Love is the answer

Who knows why
Someday, we all must die
We're all homeless boys and girls
And we are never heard

It's such a lonely
Lonely, lonely world
People turn their heads
And walk on by, tell me
Is it worth just another try

Light of the world, shine on me
Love is the answer (let it shine)
Shine on us all, set us free
Love is the answer

Tell me, are we alive
Or just a dying planet
(What are the chances)
Ask the man in your heart
For the answer

And when you feel afraid
(Love one another)
When you've lost your way
(Love one another)

And when you're all alone
(Love one another)
And when you're far from home
(Love one another)

And when you're down and out
(Love one another)
And when your hopes run out
(Love one another)

And when you need a friend
(Love one another)
And when you're near the end
(Love, we got to love
We got to love one another)

Light of the world, shine on me
Love is the answer
Shine on us all, set us free
Love is the answer

Light of the world, shine on me
Love is the answer
(Shine, shine, shine)
Shine on us all, set us free
Love is the answer

Light of the world, shine on me
Love is the answer
Shine on us all, set us free
Love is the answer

Light of the world, shine on me
Love is the answer...

The next one doesn’t fit entirely if God is the one actually singing it (lol), yet again as I pointed out in the post a couple days ago, you can feel the love being sung about and that kind of romantic love is created by God. We feel that intensity because He feels that intensity toward us. (But His is greater yet!)

Lyrics

"Because I Love You (The Postman Song)"

I got your letter from the postman just the other day
So I decided to write you this song
And just to let you know exactly the way I feel
And let you know my love's for real

Because I love you and I'll do anything
I'll give you my heart, my everything
Because I love you, I'll be right by your side
To be your light, to be your guide

If you should feel that I don't really care
And that you're starting to lose ground
Just let me reassure you that you can count on me
And that I'll always be around

Because I love you, my heart's an open door
Girl, won't you please come on in
Because I love you, I'll be right by your side
To be your light, to be your guide

If you should feel that I don't really care
And that you're starting to lose your ground
Just let me reassure you that you can count on me
And that I will always be around

Because I love you, my heart's an open door
Girl, won't you please come on in
Because I love you, I'll be right by your side
To be your light, to be your guide

The walk today was the Backside of Hays where I've seen GBH. (The first one in January, then the one around a week or ten days ago.) I'm trying to be disciplined and not “scout” for one now. A pretty cardinal did fly across the path though.