Nightly Gathering

Open Thread Post 102 - I Can't Believe It

When I mentioned to hubby this evening that I wasn't sure what to write about tonight, after a sarcastic suggestion which I laughed at, he seriously mentioned that I should write about what HE has been struggling with recently.

Yesterday when I said it had built up and then I allowed myself the release, it was because he had called and told me he's been struggling and mostly with one thought. It's a thought I hadn't really formed myself in the same manner, but once he said it, it's been on my mind as well.

We had both been with her in the emergency room on December 22nd. As I mentioned before, nobody thought she was in any danger whatsoever of losing her life, including herself. She asked, “How much longer?” (until she'd be released) and we answered what we'd been told, “Later tonight or maybe tomorrow.”

What hubby keeps picturing is what Mo must have been witnessing in her own resuscitation attempt, and been shocked to find out that she had died. What was she thinking and feeling then? Was it “I Can't Believe it?” “ I can't believe I actually died!”

After he said that, my immediate response was that she was probably with whatever spiritual beings who were her guides, and actually felt the most peace and love she'd ever known, so maybe it was okay for her. But then I pictured her being able to watch when I was told and the aftermath, as well as when he was told and the aftermath. Was she still around to witness that? It breaks my heart just thinking about it.

We both know it doesn't do any good to have these kinds of thoughts because there are no answers, at least not in this realm. One day we'll have a full, understandable picture. We'll understand why she was taken early and the ripple effect that resulted.

Not only with Morgan's passing, but with everything:

For now [in this time of imperfection] we see in a mirror dimly [a blurred reflection, a riddle, an enigma], but then [when the time of perfection comes we will see reality] face to face. Now I know in part [just in fragments], but then I will know fully, just as I have been fully known [by God].

1 Corinthians 13:12 AMP

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