Meaningful Walk

On Friday morning I was able to take a walk on what I call the Hays backend.  I guess it is also known as the Flint River Greenway.  I was listening to the following podcast with Jordan Peterson and Jonathan Pageau entitled “Dream Analysis, AI & Fairy Tales.”  It caught my attention because I’ve had these few dreams with Morgan in them and I thought I might learn something. I’ll put a link up at the end of this post.

The first thing that made me take notice was that Jonathan is in the middle of writing, or re-writing, some of the famous fairy tales like Snow White, Cinderella, Rapunzel, and Jack and the Beanstalk, and he is very gifted in analyzing the deeper meanings of these fairy tales, which they discussed.  If you want to feel stupid, listen to these two men talk.  I enjoyed these stories as a child and I enjoyed reading them to my children, but I can tell you I never once understood there was a deeper meaning to the plots. It was extremely interesting understanding that psychologically and symbolically there is more to them than meets the eye.  (Jordan did the same thing with several of the Bible stories in Genesis) It must be one of the reasons these particular stories last from generation to generation to generation. We are all gaining something subconsciously that makes us enjoy it.

I have been writing a Christian fiction book for the tween to teen age group with a tween-turned-teen, S, over the past nearly two years. We are nearing the end and she recently got to read the very first rough draft of what we have done.  We still need to end it and we know how, but we haven’t gotten to it yet.  The book has a lot of dialogue and it is light on details.  When she got done reading it, I asked her if it needed more detail, and she said, “no, I like it that way.”  I do as well.  I don’t like to read books that are overly descriptive, I just want to find out what happens next.  Well, lo and behold, Jonathan basically said that lack of description was true of these fairy tales and that he also is leaving it very basic.  That felt like confirmation number one of my walk and I felt a small load drop from my shoulders about finishing the book.

They began the discussion about dreams and while half listening, I was remembering my dream I shared here where I was laying on a bed in a fetal position while Morgan was there to see the counselor that I, my hubby, and son all see.  I had recently read some more of Morgan’s medical records and I recalled the name of one of the first nurses to document; Grace.  And then I remembered that the day Morgan was born, it was a nurse named Grace who had worked the night shift and was adamant this baby needed to be born while she was still there.  So Morgan’s life began and ended with “Grace.” I then kept thinking about laying on the bed in that dream and right around that time also telling you all how tired and unmotivated I was and that it reminded me of being pregnant with Morgan, lying on a bed in a hotel in Northern California.

Then the pieces fit together all of a sudden. God knew before she was even conceived that on Earth, her cross to bear would be that of depression.  Once she got to puberty, she no longer had the exuberant joy of childhood and slowly through the years, through her choices, our choices, God’s will, or chance, it was something she had to deal with.  God gave her “Grace” at her birth and at her death, and all the way through, just like all of us.  As I was finishing that analysis a cardinal flew across my path.  This is not the first time a cardinal has given me confirmation of a “really deep” thought.  Wild.  Those cardinals on Saturday May 6th - the “While We’re Waiting” retreat weekend - also seemed to answer something for me.

We walked across a bridge over the Flint River at this point and usually we keep going, but my dog decided she was done going that direction.  Fine, we turned around right there.  I kept listening to the interesting podcast for another ten minutes or so on my way back to the car, when two more cardinals crossed my path.  I asked myself, “Do three cardinals equal one Great Blue Heron?”

If the dog hadn’t wanted to turn around, would I have seen them anyway?  Would they have flown across the path no matter when the next human came along, or was the timing perfect for me to see them? I don’t know!  But it happened like it happened.  A little further along, there was a man with a dog coming from the other direction.  Even though I had the “gentle leader” on my dog, which is a kind of strap that has a little clasp that you hook the leash to under the dog’s snout making it much easier to control them, especially if they want to pull hard, I stepped a bit off the path anyway because I didn’t want to take any chances with my back.

He called out that it’s okay and I called out and asked if that was an English Pointer he had.  He said it was and we drew a little nearer letting out dogs meet each other.  My girl did a terrific job and so the man began telling me that the previous week there was a dog he’d seen several times on his walks, a mastiff he thought with one ear up and one ear floppy, who slipped his collar and attacked the brother of this English Pointer.  He pulled out his phone and showed me the big chuck taken out of his dog’s side, now covered in stitches.

I really felt this was good information for me to know and a description I can obviously remember! I have told you that I am generally friendly with everybody and might have let my dog get a little too close to this biting mastiff.

So friends, you can see why this was a meaningful walk.  I got confirmation that I don’t need to worry about not putting too much detail in a book for kids of the age group I am targeting.  I analyzed a dream I’d had with Morgan that fits and feels confirmed by cardinal number one.  I got to see two additional cardinals and get some information that will potentially help me, and especially my dog, in the future.  I didn’t get to finish that podcast until this morning’s very early morning walk, and if you find yourself with time and curiosity, I highly recommend it!

“If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones. But if you are dishonest in little things, you won’t be honest with greater responsibilities.”

Luke 16:10 NLT