In Good Company

Post 275

It’s been busy this past week and I have a lot to write about.

First up the While We’re Waiting reunion last Friday and Saturday. About half of our original group was there with one “newcomer” who had been at a different weekend than ours. She was welcomed in with open arms.

Friday night I learned something that natives of Alabama had known, but it came as a complete surprise to me. There is a syndicated morning radio duo here called “Rick and Bubba.” Hubby and I usually enjoy listening to their Southern good ‘ol boy banter as they discuss cultural and newsworthy events if we’re in a car while they're on. They sometimes give a Christian spin on the topics at hand as well.

When we were all discussing the transition of feeling like you might like to laugh or have fun for the first time after the death, Karen Harmening mentioned that within a few days after their daughter's very public death (which I posted about last year as well), they’d received a phone call with wonderful words from Rick Burgess of the above duo, who knew of which he spoke because he’d lost a young son to a drowning many years earlier. I had never known that! He said something to the effect of “in your sadness, remember that Sarah wouldn't want you to have a worse life now, because she’d had a life at all.” I thought that was extremely profound.

When I got home, I searched the story and came across Rick’s Eulogy which I listened to on my Monday walk. He definitely had the strength of God in him when he spoke. It’s almost impossible that he could say what he did or sound so strong just those few days after. As you can see I linked it. If you listen, understand that he is Southern Baptist and their way is to kind of lead you to a “decision,” whereas other Christian denominations help you “turn into” a disciple without you probably remembering a day/time that you flipped from wordly to follower. It's exciting that many options are available and people can explore, asking for God’s wisdom, to worship in a way that is both Biblical and fits your own personality.

(This is not to say that all Christian churches are Biblical. Many no longer are and this was foretold in The Bible as well.)

Through the conversations both Friday and Saturday, I realized that with very few exceptions, for my entire life, almost all people I have had any association with, in good times or bad, have been very decent people. Some people, in this aftermath, had really confrontational, narcissistic, dare I say evil people they encountered. Not random people - people they knew. My worst experience was Christmas day of 2022, but at least it wasn't confrontational. What is going on in any person's heart who can treat grieving parents in any way except loving? I am truly amazed at the gained wisdom and strength of the people I was with Friday night and Saturday.

Monday was April 8th, the one year anniversary of Morgan’s Celebration of Life. (I felt it on Saturday the 6th as that would have been the Saturday 52 weeks earlier). At the reunion, we had pulled pork and homemade Mac & Cheese at lunch, too - two of the foods that had been on our menu.

Monday morning I started work at my usual time, somewhere between 630 and 7 am. I’d been in and out of my office a few times for coffee or bathroom or feeding the dog by about 825 when hubby came in to say goodbye. He bent down and picked up an upside down 4x6 picture off the floor by the door.

This is the very same picture that in January had also flipped itself off the shelf it was on into the hallway. I’ve told many friends that story along with about 8 other strange innocuous occurrences that happened during late December and January. Since this picture “falling” had happened previously, I had it set in a way that it couldn't happen again. No way! I don't want to look for things and make them up in my head. I had made sure it couldn't just happen again, yet it did! April 8th. Hubby wanted to poo poo it like he’d done with my other “occurrences,” but then he said, “but I can’t explain what I heard either.”

About ten days earlier, two days before his 60th birthday March 28th, he was home during the afternoon because he’d just had a tooth extracted. I was gone walking the dog. He heard the doorknob of the back door turning like someone was trying to get in (but it was locked). That twisting back and forth sound? He jumped up, got there, and opened the door but there was nobody there. No car, no people, too sudden that anybody could disappear away from the door that fast. Things that make you go “hmm.”

This is the snapshot I spoke about. I’ve included it in this blog before, but she was so dang adorable!

Now back to my walk on April 8th. I listened to Rick Burgess’s eulogy as I visited Mo at The Spot (a tree where I’ve hidden a beautiful container with some of her ashes) and as I finished and was leaving the area, I cut it off a minute or two before the end because he was done but making the “invitation” I spoke about above. I flipped to Pandora, and what song came on immediately? Only the first song from her Celebration of Life. I immediately took a screenshot.

I just thought Thank You God for giving me pieces of her today. Timing is EVERYTHING. It honestly wouldn't surprise me if we someday find that we lived in some kind of time warp for God to make these Godwinks happen. Time stops but we don't feel it or know it happened. Who knows? All I know is that I ask and He blesses me like this way more than I feel like I deserve.

I watched the recording of the COL service and cried my eyes out, but came away with a better understanding of my daughter than even before. She was actually a bit of a different person outside of the confines of our family. She was exactly the person we had raised her to be - a light in other’s orbits whether it be friends, coworkers, patients, or strangers. A person who did her best “on the job” whether it was sporting competitions or employment. You see Mo’s brother, four years older, has a charismatic humorous personality, but has more empathy in his little finger than many people have in their entirety. I realized after watching this time that probably around her tween years she realized THAT was too much to compete with and took on a different, toned down personality within our family dynamic, but expressed that crazier fun side when she was with friends only. I am left happy she brought humor and good times to others.

Monday evening Mo’s friend Emily texted me a story about Mo I didn't know. What a gift!

As I close out tonight, the final thing is just a request to keep my cousin Jenny, known in this substack as Rock 2, and her family in your prayers as tomorrow they go through Matthew's first birthday without him here. 💔 💕

For those that keep reading, as I was closing down the app after hitting “publish,” I saw the other thing I wanted to mention about April 8th but forgot.

As I was driving back home from my walk, after having just experienced all of the above, an old song came on and I’ve always known the main verse, but like many songs, there are always words I don't know what the heck they are! Therefore I like the song, but don’t know “what it’s about” or try to figure it out. The song is by R.E.M and the words I always know are:

“This one goes out to the one I love
This one goes out to the one I've left behind…”

How crazy is that? I looked up the words I didn't know and nothing else fits, but at the moment I was hearing it, it felt like it had been sent from Mo herself right then.